Flash Fiction 2

Playmates

by Tabatha Wood ©️ 2019

I picked up the ball and threw it towards them and flashed a big, goofy smile. It narrowly missed hitting the back of Sally’s legs. She whirled around and saw me, her features darkened to a scowl. I grinned wider and waved.

“Hi!”

I watched her eyes roll and her lip curl. She put both hands on her hips.

“Go away, Caroline. We don’t want to play with you.”

She always said that. I wasn’t deterred.

“But Mum said I had to come out and find you.”

“No. She didn’t. Go away.”

I tried to keep my smile glued on, and swallowed hard.

“She really did. She doesn’t like me coming out here on my own.”

“Caroline. Just get this through your thick head. Please. You cannot play with us. You are not welcome. Leave us alone.”

The others crowded round her, a semicircle of distain aimed squarely in my direction.

Another girl, who I didn’t know, addressed me with a venomous sneer.

“Yeah, Caroline. Piss off. You shouldn’t even be here.”

I chewed my lip uncertainly and shifted my weight from one foot to the other.

“But…”

Sally lunged towards me.

“No! Just go away! Don’t make me force you!”

I saw her eyes go dark and her face change.

I dipped my head and felt my own eyes prickle. I sniffed. A slim line of mucus dribbled out of my nostrils and I caught it on the back of my hand. The silver slime left a slug-like trail. I wiped it slowly on the leg of my jeans and watched each girl’s face wrinkle in revulsion.

“Oh, my God. You’re so gross.”

Sally turned her back on me. Put her arms around the shoulders of the two nearest girls.

I sighed.

“Okay, Sally,” I called out. “Maybe tomorrow then?”

She made no sign that she had even heard me.

I walked to the gate at the end of the cemetery. I paused, put my hand on a gravestone by the wall. Read the words on the stone just like I did every day. Like I’d done for going on three months now.

SALLY HENDERSON

2003 – 2019

“I really miss you, Sally,” I whispered. “I wish you’d play with me again.”

Finding My Way Back

My regular readers and followers will know that I frequently write for mental health. I’m also aware that this often turns people off too.

“Oh great, she’s going on about depression again.”

“Why does she always focus on the serious stuff?”

“She must be pretty unstable if she has to keep focusing on all that.”

Yeah.

I “go on about it” because it’s incredibly important to me, and because I believe that one of the best ways to change things that aren’t working, is to address our challenges and to talk about them.

I’ve not been my best self recently. I’ve been demotivated and anxious, and I had failed to kept up with my daily writing routine. I felt like it wasn’t bringing me the level of joy I had become accustomed to. I wasn’t sure why at first, but I also recognised that I had been giving out a lot of energy, without feeling like I was getting any in return. I wasn’t feeling seen for what I was doing. As a result, I’d lost sight of my real purpose and goals.

Amanda Palmer talks in her book “The Art of Asking” about the basic human need to be seen by others.

“There’s a difference between wanting to be looked at and wanting to be seen. When you are looked at, your eyes can be closed. You suck energy, you steal the spotlight. When you are seen, your eyes must be open, and you are seeing and recognising your witness. You accept energy and you generate energy. You create light. One is exhibitionism, the other is connection. Not everybody wants to be looked at. Everybody wants to be seen.”

I had fallen into the trap of believing others were “stealing” my energy. Merely taking what I was offering them and giving nothing in return. This wasn’t true, my self-doubt demons were whispering in my mind and making me think the worst.

I am a Wild Woman. I am connected with myself and I recognise and understand the many paths my life journey has led me along. I am done with asking for permission to take up space. I don’t believe you measure your own self worth by the opinions of others. I believe in living your life with authenticity and integrity, and that you become a better person by lifting others up not by putting them down. I don’t listen to people who tell me what I cannot do, and how people treat me or respond to me says nothing about me and absolutely everything about them. I also know most people — myself included — are works in progress. I try to always be kind, or at least strive to understand others’ motivations.

I am a Wild Woman, I know this without a doubt, but I’m no Wonder Woman. I’m still human, and I still fail sometimes.

I realised that not only was my writing not enriching me in the way it used to, I had stopped exercising and moving physically as much as I did. My daily routine always involved me reading or catching up with a good TV show while hula hooping in the morning. I’d been under the weather, I had a cold, it was as good an excuse as any to “take it easy”. Except, when I got better, I didn’t return to my routine. I got a lot of headaches, especially in the morning, one almost every day. I was starting to worry that something might be wrong with me. I felt constantly tired and I wasn’t getting outside enough. I wasn’t walking around and getting fresh air. I was squirrelling myself away at home, hiding behind a computer screen, being “busy”. Except my being busy also seemed to end up becoming some strange form of self-flagellation while worrying about what people thought of me. Tweeting excessively but getting no likes. Refreshing the browser just in case I’d missed something. All the many toxic things I turned my back on when I gave up Facebook.

Social media can be amazing. It can inspire, connect, heal and educate. It can also be a heaving cesspit of narcissism, trolls and and irrational behaviour. I don’t want to get into a larger discussion about social media, but for me, and knowing my own personality and behavioural traits, it is not always a very pleasant place for me to play. For me, right now, “The only winning move is not to play.” (WarGames, 1983) I am still working on strategies where I can use the positive parts of social media without getting sucked in completely.

And so, I had realised I needed to clear my head, and get rid of the ball of anxiety which seemed to be turning my stomach to stone every day. I took a walk on the beach.

Whenever I need to quieten my mind, or just get a sense of myself again, I go to the sea. The sea doesn’t care who you are or what you do — it can be beautiful and calm, or mighty and terrifying. It just does as it wants, and it needs no validation. I can identify with that. It’s the same feeling I get when I get up somewhere really high. It puts everything in perspective and gives me space to focus. If you want to get a sense of that feeling, watch Carl Sagan’s “The Pale Blue Dot” on YouTube https://youtu.be/GO5FwsblpT8

The sun was bright but the wind was bitter, I had to keep walking to stay warm. It was late in the day and the sun dipped towards the ocean, bathing everything in a strange yet peaceful light. I walked to the rocks at the far side of the beach and watched the waves flick up and over their jagged edges. I found pieces of smooth beach glass, which always makes me smile, and I held it in my palm as I walked. I stopped, and breathed deep. I let go of all my negative thoughts. I felt fully seen by the elements and the land.

This morning I returned to my usual exercise routine. I felt so much better for doing it. I chose turmeric tea over coffee and I didn’t get a morning headache for once. I turned off Twitter and logged out of everything else, and sat down and wrote for a while. All those old feelings of joy returned. Satisfaction through artistic development and my personal creative journey. I felt more like myself again. Not so stretched. Balanced and more calm.

Recognising your unhealthy behaviours can be a necessary and important process, just as any self-care is essential to you. I’d fallen into a very common trap of expecting to gain validation through the opinions of others. Letting comments and likes dictate how I felt. It made me miserable, and unfulfilled. Because, ultimately, I know that while support and praise are wonderful, you cannot be emotionally satisfied if you pin all your happiness on that which others give you. You have to give it to yourself too. Recognise your achievements and celebrate how far you’ve come. Because if that attention is not forthcoming, or is lacking in some way, it can be far too easy for you to convince yourself you’ve failed. And that’s simply not true.

I write about writing for wellness, because without it, when I stop writing, I stop being well. I don’t have to write *about* mental health, to be writing *for* it. I write to bring focus to myself and my experiences, to put things into proper perspective so that I can acknowledge and assess the impact those experiences have had on me. I write because sometimes it is easier to put my thoughts on paper than to verbalise them, especially if those words are difficult to say. I recognise that writing every day helps me challenge my anxieties, release tension and frustration in my mind and body, and brings order to my daily routine.

I am “well written”. I write to feel well, and it works.

Some Notes On Self-Publishing Ebooks

I recently ran a writing group in my adoptive home-town of Wellington which focused on self-publishing. The following are my notes from my presentation where I spoke about my experiences self-publishing my ebook.


A little bit about me

I moved to Wellington in 2017 from Leicester in the UK. I’ve always enjoyed writing, and before my kids were born I wrote and published three non-fiction books for education with Bloomsbury Press.

I always dreamed about publishing some of my fiction, but I just never made the time to actually do it. Being in Wellington and being a part of a writing group inspired me to get back into writing regularly, and I decided, on a whim, to enter a short story competition — the first one ever. I didn’t win, but I did get an honourable mention, and in some sort of fit of madness I decided that as I was turning 40 this year, I wanted to try writing a few more stories and publishing them as an anthology myself. It wasn’t really anything other than an experiment of sorts, just to see if I could.

I have to say that while I have — mostly — enjoyed the process, I wasn’t prepared for everything it entailed.

Self-publishing is, first and foremost, a labour of love. It requires many skills, or at least the willingness to learn them. It can be done with absolutely zero financial cost, or you can ‘pay-to-play’ as you wish. But one thing it most certainly is not, is easy.

You will build the house. You will decorate the house. You will furnish it and landscape the garden. You will deal with the real estate people and any queries and concerns from the council. Essentially, you will do everything there is to do, and it will take away a lot of your precious writing and creating time. At end of the day, your house still might not be up to code. Without great foundations, any structure will inevitably crumble.

Why self-publish?

• You have complete control over the entire creative and selling process. You don’t need to impress any “gatekeepers”.

• You will pay the full cost of producing your work (and that means financial and mental!) and you are responsible for marketing and distribution. The copyright, the subsidiary rights, and all profits are exclusively yours.

• Self publishing ebooks can be done without investing any money in the process at all — but bear in mind you might want to pay for certain services to make your life easier, or just for certain parts of the process which you don’t have the skills to do.

• Self-publishing is a labour of love. You are unlikely to make much money off your ebooks, in fact you might even end up making a loss.

Remember: If you self publish you will have to organise the editing and proof-reading process yourself.

You can get a good group of writer friends to be your beta readers or you can pay for a service to do it for you. I don’t recommend skipping this step and trying to do it all yourself. Friends and family are great, but they probably won’t be honest enough with you, nor always have the skills you want to help you. Unless you have a copy-editing uncle or professional proof reader best-friend.

For example, I signed up to SpecFicNZ who offer an editing and mentoring service for new authors. Places such as New Zealand Society of Authors are well worth joining for professional help and advice. YourBooks, who offer a book printing service, will also match you with a mentor and editor if you wish. A lot of people choose to self-publish to avoid the “gatekeepers”, but do bear in mind that despite what some people believe, they are actually very keen to see you succeed.

Take time to get your manuscript as good as you can. You will always want to tweak it and change bits, but it’s best to take your time and don’t rush it, and get the best version out there that you can. Once it is released, you can’t take it back.

(Of course, ebooks are a little different to print copies as you usually can upload new and revised versions very easily, but you don’t really want the headache of doing that.)

Remember: you can control what you put on the page — you cannot control how people respond to it. Keep that in mind when people review or criticise your work, but also view all criticism as being useful, even if that’s just that you know to ignore that person’s views in the future! Your book is your “paper baby”, keep positive throughout the process. The end result is worth it.

Where do you want to put your ebook to sell?

Amazon KDP — Kindle Direct Publishing — is by far the easiest. The downloadable apps Kindle Create and Kindle Viewer will do pretty much all of the heavy lifting for you and create a file that is what you see is what you get so there are no nasty surprises when your put your book in the online store.

Publishing takes less than 5 minutes and your book appears on Kindle stores worldwide within 24-48 hours. Plus you can earn higher royalties than most other publishing providers.

However, not every one wants to support Amazon, and if you want to take advantage of their marketing tools you need to sign up to KDP Select which then prohibits you from putting your book anywhere else. KDP Select requires exclusivity, which means you can’t sell your book in other stores such as Smashwords and the retailers and library suppliers

Smashwords and Draft2Digital are two other good options, but will require a little more technical knowledge. My personal preference is Draft2Digital as their website and user experience is much nicer, plus they also have an online eBook previewer so you can see straight away if there are any formatting errors.

ISBN’s are not required on eBooks but your book will be more successful if you have one because you’ll enjoy broader distribution.  If you don’t attach an ISBN through the Smashwords ISBN Manager, Smashwords cannot distribute your book to Apple or Kobo.

Which retailers require a book to have an ISBN? Apple; Baker & Taylor Axis360 and Blio; Kobo; Library Direct; Overdrive; Gardners; and others. 

Which don’t require an ISBN? Barnes & Noble, Inktera (formerly known as Page Foundry) and Scribd.

Amazon, Draft2Digital and Smashwords will all provide you with an ISBN if needed. Or you can contact the National Library of New Zealand to provide you with one. (You will need to provide them with an electronic copy of your book once it is available for sale.) You will need an ISBN for each format of your book — you cannot reuse the ISBN attached to an ePub for a hard copy. Likewise, Amazon will give you a specific Kindle ISBN which should not be used with other distributors.

What is DRM?

DRM stands for Digital Rights Management, and it refers to schemes in which a digital book is copy-protected, or limited to reading on only certain devices. Books on Smashwords do not contain DRM. However, these works are still the property of the copyright holder, and most are only licensed for the personal use of the purchaser. KDP does include DRM. It’s up to you if you wish to include it or not.

Smashwords distributes to such as Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, OverDrive, Scribd and others.  Amazon only reaches ebook readers in about 14 countries, whereas Apple Books reaches 51 countries (and dominates the Australian ebook market), Kobo reaches about 160 countries and the Smashwords store reaches almost 200 countries.

Where can Draft2Digital distribute my books?

• Amazon

• Apple Books

• Barnes & Noble

• Google Play Books

• Kobo (including Kobo Plus)

• Tolino

• OverDrive

• Bibliotheca

• Scribd

• 24Symbols

• Playster

• Baker & Taylor

A couple of things to think about:

What software are you going to use?

Consider the devices people will use to read your book.

Mac users tend to use Pages, Microsoft users generally use Word.

Aldiko, Cool Reader, Bluefire, Kindle, Apple Books, Nook, Moon+, Wattpad, Kobo, Scribd and Google Play are all e-readers. You should get to know them and consider how your ebook will display on them all.

Smashwords and Draft2Digital can take your properly formatted .doc file and turn it into a wonderfully formatted ebook — but only if you format it correctly yourself! Exporting a Pages file into a .doc format can mess up the formatting. Some ebook readers are much more forgiving than others — Kindle and Apple Books tend to play nice with everything. Total Reader and Libby (by Overdrive,) not so much.

There are a whole wealth of different readers and apps and all of them can make your beautiful ebook look like minced beef if your formatting is not correct.

Consider what formats you want to make available — most commonly: epub, mobi, pdf, online reader (txt). Pages will export your file into an Ebook or Pdf very easily and you can even publish direct to Apple Books in this way.

A Note on Formatting

Scrivner — a great piece of word processing and writing software — can make some really great and complex ebooks where you have full control of the way it will look. But some readers still won’t play nice with them!

Do not use TAB key to make indents for new paragraphs! Always set indents in the document formatting and use clearly defined styles. Chapter titles should be Headings, while the rest of the text is Body. It looks very nice to use dropped capitals in hard copy books, but most ebook readers can’t cope with them.

In terms of general formatting you should do pretty much the same as you would with a manuscript you intend to print — 12 point, 1.5 or double line spaced, in Times New Roman or Helvetica is usually standard, but KDP will use their own formats and fonts. You don’t need to worry about page sizes in the same way as hard copy, but always use a Page break between each chapter to create clean sections — never multiple return key presses!

It s a good idea to turn on the “invisibles” in the document when you are checking over formatting so you can straight away for any unusual spaces, returns, tabs etc.

KDP will create a clickable table of contents for you, no muss no fuss. Smashwords you will need to make one yourself by adding bookmarks in your document. If you are not used to doing this it is not difficult but it is a pain.

Draft2Digital will create one for you but only if you have formatted it correctly in the first place (using Headings).

KDP will only allow you add jpegs and tiffs at the moment, so if your book is picture heavy they may not be the very best display format. Remember that ebooks can be scrolled and zoomed so pictures should look good and not pixelated.

You will need to create your own cover (or have someone do it for you). KDP have a cover creator tool which will produce something pretty fun, but if you want to make your own you should use an image that is a jpeg or a tiff file less than 50MB. Try to avoid compressing your files. This can affect the quality of your cover when displayed on reading devices. For the best results, images should have a minimum resolution of 300 PPI (pixels per inch).

The ideal size of your eBook cover art is a height/width ratio of 1.6:1. This means that for every 1,000 pixels in width, the image should be 1,600 pixels in height. To ensure the best quality for your image, particularly on high definition devices, the height of the image should be at least 2,500 pixels. Ideal dimensions for cover files are 2,560 x 1,600 pixels.

The minimum image size allowed is 1,000 x 625 pixels. The maximum image size allowed is 10,000 x 10,000 pixels.

As well as your actual book content you will need to include front matter and back matter:

Front matter:

Title page(s): A title page has, at a minimum, the full title of the work, including the subtitle (if any), and the name of the author and—if applicable—illustrator. Everything else depends on the type of book, but may include:

• Publisher’s name and address

• Copyright information

• ISBN

• Edition notice

• Date of publication

Dedication: A dedication is a part of the front matter that is written by the author and includes the names of the person/persons for whom the publication was written.

Epigraph: An epigraph is a quotation included by the author that is relevant but not essential to the text.

Table of Contents: A table of contents is typically in the middle of the front matter. It may be a very simple listing of what is in the book, or it may be very detailed and include descriptions of each chapter or section

Foreword: A foreword is an essay, or short piece of writing, written by someone other than the author. It often explains the relationship between the writer of the foreword and either the author or the story being told.

Preface: A preface is an introduction to the book that is written by the author. It usually covers how the publication came into being, where the idea for the book came from, etc.

Acknowledgements: Another part of front matter is an acknowledgement, which is written by the author and acknowledges those who have helped him/her in the writing of the publication.

The author is responsible for writing the preface, acknowledgement, introduction, dedication, and prologue.

Back Matter

Epilogue

Afterward

About the Author

It is completely up to you how much you write for the front and back matter, but the copyright and publishing information is absolutely essential.

When you come to publish your book online you will also need to include a blurb and a short description of the books content. You want to write something immediately exciting and enticing — generally 150 to 200 words are enough for a full blurb.

The opening of your blurb has to be incredibly precise and dynamic. The synopsis is critical. You need to hook the reader in with your blurb’s first line. You have a limited amount of real estate to capture someone’s attention. Use keywords correctly without spamming the keyword algorithms.

For fiction — mostly novels — you will want to use the format of:

• Main character:

• Primary conflict:

• Stakes:

• Genre keywords:

You might also want to include quotes and reviews from other people to use in promotion.

If you want to market on Goodreads and Amazon you will want to put together an Author’s Bio page where people can find out more about you, perhaps with links to social media — Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc. or your own blog or webpage.

I also recommend that if you don’t already have one, get an email specifically for your all your writing business and keep your writing life separate from your personal one — the last thing you really want to be doing is emailing potential distributors from fluffypinkbunny@gmail.com

You can publish your book in five minutes, that much is true, but you will need to put in a lot more time and preparation than that before you go ahead and click the button, and it pays to keep reminding yourself why you are doing this and staying realistic about the whole process.


Just for fun — Neil Gaiman’s 8 rules for writing

1. Write

2. Put one word after another. Find the right word, put it down.

3. Finish what you’re writing. Whatever you have to do to finish it, finish it.

4. Put it aside. Read it pretending you’ve never read it before. Show it to friends whose opinion you respect and who like the kind of thing that this is.

5. Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.

6. Fix it. Remember that, sooner or later, before it ever reaches perfection, you will have to let it go and move on and start to write the next thing. Perfection is like chasing the horizon. Keep moving.

7. Laugh at your own jokes.

8. The main rule of writing is that if you do it with enough assurance and confidence, you’re allowed to do whatever you like. (That may be a rule for life as well as for writing. But it’s definitely true for writing.) So write your story as it needs to be written. Write it ­honestly, and tell it as best you can. I’m not sure that there are any other rules. Not ones that matter.

A Thank You

As a special thank you to all of my readers, followers, lurkers and friends, I am releasing “Last Chapter,” one of my favourite stories published in my new collection Dark Winds Over Wellington, for you to read online for free.*

?

last-chapter-1.pdf

* This story is copyright. Except for the purpose of fair review, no part may be stored or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including recording or storage in any information retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. No reproduction may be made, by any means, unless a licence has been obtained from the author or publisher. ©️ Tabatha Wood 2019

You Like Me. Right Now You Like Me.

Praise for “Dark Winds Over Wellington: Chilling Tales of the Weird & the Strange”

“The stories in Tabatha Wood’s collection are carefully and intelligently crafted. You may think they’re just a tasty creepy snack, but then you start to feel a bit queasy, the cordyceps pokes out through your forehead and you find your perspective eerily adjusted. Slyly subversive horror. Recommended.”

Jamie Delano – writer of Lepus Dizzy books, Hellblazer: Constantine (Vertigo) comics and graphic novels, and many others.

“Wood has a lovely physicality to her writing that further supports both the beautiful and that which is less so. She writes about the heat of coffee and weighty warmth of summers as well as the coppery tang-taste-of-blood and things seen and heard that characters wish they hadn’t been witness to.”

– Review by Stella Carruthers on her blog Geographic Hearts https://geographichearts.blog/2019/05/03/a-breath-of-fresh-air-a-book-review/

“In my favourite story in this collection – The Things You See – those threads of nature, otherness and displacement are exquisitely entwined. The story’s unreliable narrator who informs us that their “brain got broken”, and their attempts to understand the corruption that is at the heart of their country and at the heart of those who are supposed to protect it and its citizens, is horror at it’s best. … Dark Winds over Wellington is an ambitious debut collection and I look forward to reading more by Tabatha in the future.”

– 4 * Review by Penny Jones via Ginger Nuts of Horror http://gingernutsofhorror.com/fiction-reviews/dark-winds-over-wellington-by-tabatha-wood-book-review

What a delightfully spooky collection of tales. These stories speak to universal human fears and anxieties, while simultaneusly capturing the unique character of our beautiful Antipodean capital. The juxtaposition of mundane struggles of everyday life and the the fantastical horrors lurking just out of sight makes for compelling reading.

Amazon 5 * review by Heather Christensen

A brilliant, immersive book, I couldn’t put it down! Dark and chilling tales with twists and turns have you wondering what will happen next. Highly recommended!

Amazon 5 * review by Laura Crichton


I’ve received some amazing reviews recently. Some of them so good I have to go back and check they are actually written about my work. Words that I have put down on paper, (or pixel, in the case of the ebook,) and released upon the world.

I’m beginning to feel a little like Sally Fields when she made her Academy Awards acceptance speech: “I can’t deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me.”

Don’t worry, I’m not completely naive enough or cocky enough to assume that everyone does – or will – like my work, and that surely at some point my elation will come crashing down on the coattails of a bad review. But to quote another famous actor, or character at least, I kind of hope that my response to that will be similar to that of the Dude: “Yeah, well, that’s like, just your opinion, man.”

And then I’ll go away and cry for a week, and come back, keyboard blazing, for round two. Ha!

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, despite all of my terrible, crippling imposter syndrome, I know deep down that my writing doesn’t completely suck. But I also know it can be better. It will be better. Hell, I’ve improved more in six months than I had in six years just by writing more frequently and critically. I still read back some of my stories, tales which are only a few months old, and think, “That’s a bit clunky. I could definitely improve that. This character is a bit weak. There’s a few too many commas here…”

However, as the acclaimed writer Neil Gaiman reminds us; “Remember that, sooner or later, before it ever reaches perfection, you will have to let it go and move on and start to write the next thing. Perfection is like chasing the horizon. Keep moving.”

So I’m keeping moving. I’m using everything as a learning opportunity and a chance to improve my skills. This weekend I’m hosting a writing workshop where I will be talking about my experiences with self-publishing. Which seems insane in some ways. I wrote six pages of notes detailing everything I’d learned along the way and blew my own mind. I’m hosting a workshop as a published author and passing on all those things I’ve learned which I didn’t know a thing about six months ago. I did not see that coming at all.

It probably sounds a bit crazy but every time I see that paperback sitting on my desk with my name on it, a massive wave of emotions hit me all over again. I wrote a book. A book which people actually seem to like. A book which people are happy to pay for, review, and display on their shelves. They read it on the bus to work. They read it in the bath. They own a piece of my thoughts.

As the Dude might say; “That’s, like, so weird, man.”

Utilising the Purple Cow – Dark Winds Book Trailer

Have you ever seen a purple cow? I’m guessing that you haven’t. Or at least, not a real, live one. You would most certainly remember such a thing, standing casually in a field, grazing with its herd.

When it comes to business, using a Purple Cow aims to make your product, business model, or marketing strategy unique. It (hopefully) enables you to stand out. I like looking for the Purple Cow opportunities, for ways to make things just that little bit more interesting.

So… if you’ve never seen a purple cow, have you ever seen a book trailer?

“Dark Winds Over Wellington: Chilling Tales of the Weird & the Strange” just got a little weirder. You check out the exclusive trailer for the new anthology here.

Siren Songs

Not every female character in my new collection is a great one. Some aren’t even very good. They are manipulative. Problematic. Indecisive or haunted by their past. But one thing they very much all are, are Strong Women. They ain’t taking any shit. They’re doing their thing their way and to hell with anyone who tries to stop them. They might not get it right every time, but that’s never going to put them off nor put them down. I enjoyed writing all of them.

With that in mind, here’s my latest Spotify playlist to accompany the stories. Fifty songs by some of the best female voices in the past forty years. All of them formidable, indomitable women.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/52TwmQpqY7ix5lw1KfQe4z?si=USip9jkrRK2OfyKuxSdWaA

Image credit https://unsplash.com/@aloragriffiths

The Journey of a Self-Published Author, or How I DIY’d It and Learned a Lot About the Other Side of Writing a Book.

Image credit @Kiwihug via Unsplash

I published my debut collection of short fiction in March of this year — “Dark Winds Over Wellington: Chilling Tales of the Weird & the Strange.” The title itself, while a bit of a mouthful, is a nod to both some of the overly long titles used in the 18th century, and to the Penny Dreadfuls from the early 19th century. At that time, book promotion was rather different to today’s methods. Authors would seek to hook in their readers with an explanatory and tantalising title, giving a little taste of what was to come.

Book promotion may well be different now, but it does still present many challenges, especially to those who choose to self-publish. Most indie authors rely on repetitively spamming friends and family with links to their books, in the hope that eventually someone will buy it. Reviews from other readers and writers on Twitter and targeted blogs also help a great deal. Getting your book bought and read can often seem harder than writing it in the first place.

I decided to self-publish independently for a few reasons, and avoiding the so-called Gatekeepers wasn’t one of them. In all honesty, I wrote a book as an experiment. I simply wanted to see if I could. I’ve written three non-fiction books for an academic publisher, but I’d never published fiction. I hadn’t even entered a fiction competition until September last year. I like a challenge, and I love writing, so it seemed like a winning combination.

The industry has changed so much in the past fifteen years; pretty much anyone can write and self-publish a book. Which is wonderful, and yet, pretty much anyone can write and self-publish a book. There is a definite over-saturation of certain markets occurring, and I’m quite interested to see where it is all going. On the one hand it makes it so much easier to share your voice and present your art, but on the other, it can make it harder to filter out some of the exceptional stuff from the mediocre. Although it irks me to even say such a thing, as knowing now what I do about the trials and tribulations of self-publishing, I have the absolute utmost respect for anyone who even considers it.

Self-publishing is, first and foremost, a labour of love. It requires many skills, or at least the willingness to learn them. It can be done with absolutely zero financial cost, or you can ‘pay-to-play’ as you wish. But one thing it most certainly is not, is easy.

You will build the house. You will decorate the house. You will furnish it and landscape the garden. You will deal with the real estate people and any queries and concerns from the council. Essentially, you will do everything there is to do, and it will take away a lot of your precious writing and creating time. At the end of the day, your house still might not be up to code. Without great foundations, any structure will inevitably crumble.

It’s not enough to simply write a good story. If you self-publish, it must also look good. It must be formatted correctly and copy-edited thoroughly. Any teeny, tiny typos you may have missed can be collected by your readers, and fashioned into your hangman’s noose. How ironic it is that some people will be far more likely to comment on your mistakes than congratulate you on your achievements. I can almost guarantee that you will get far more hung up on one bad review than a hundred good ones. And so it goes.

Imposter Syndrome gets talked about a lot in creative circles, and it is a real, and often very crippling, affliction. Every writer worth their salt, even the ‘big names’, experience a visit from this particular gremlin sometimes. That terrible nausea felt when someone new reads your work. “Please read this. Please don’t read this!” The thoughts that tumble around your head will fight and contradict. Personally, I get a ridiculous amount of anxiety every time I think about how a complete stranger can now read my work and react to it in a way I have no control over. That’s okay in some ways — I know that I can only control what’s on the page, not how people respond to it — but in others, I want to be there with them, explaining some of the finer plot points and putting things into context.

When you self-publish you do avoid the Gatekeepers, as the publishing industry gets called. You have complete control over what you do, but it is absolutely imperative that you find a good, critical peer group who will be brutally honest as well as constructive. Friends and family will likely tell you your work is wonderful regardless, for fear of upsetting you. They might not have the necessary skills or experience to pick up any spelling or grammatical mistakes. Some of them will take your manuscript with a sincere promise to read and review, but never actually make the time.

I think you have to be a particular flavour of confident to self-publish without any outside help at all. I definitely couldn’t have done it. I was extremely lucky to find a bunch of people who offered up their time and experience willingly and without complaint. I have thanked them via my book’s Acknowledgments page, but I know that in a lot of ways I cannot ever thank them enough.

If there is one particular thing I have learned through my endeavour, is different kinds of word processing software hate one another. Formatting is a pain in the ass. You are much better to write in plain text in a notepad app and deal with any formatting issues after the fact, than you are to try utilising built-in templates. Never, ever, no matter how tempting it may seem, use tab stops to indent paragraphs. It will cause you to invent and express so many swear words, it would make Dennis Leary blush. Tab stop indented paragraphs are the Devil. Don’t do it. Set indents using the aptly named ‘indents’ setting, and walk away.

When it comes to exporting as an electronic publication, your software will also likely throw you a few curve balls. An ePub may display beautifully on Kindle or Apple Books, but look like a pile of absolute mangled shit on OverDrive or TotalReader. Epubs should always be reflowable; it allows the reader to view them how they need to, and I believe it is important to recognise that publishing digitally grants you an obligation to consider accessibility functions.

When you create something which should be accessible to all, consider those with disabilities first. You can then make something for everyone to enjoy. Just like installing a ramp instead of stairs – no-one gets shut out. However, if you don’t get the formatting right, you can end up making the experience at best, suboptimal, at worst, completely impossible for those who rely on certain features.

Some self-published authors often give away their books for free, or for very minimal amounts. Their argument being more sales for less cash are better than fewer for more. Not me. The reason for that is not out of greed, or unwillingness to share, but because the Arts are far too frequently treated as if they have less worth than other professions. My time and my energy is worth my fee. As is any other writer’s. I admit, in the past, I have pirated books. I didn’t even think much about what I was doing. I cringe with shame now. How dare I think so little of a fellow author’s hard work? I’ve bought ebook versions of some of the books I stole. It’s a small token of apology, but I needed to atone.

NaNoWriMo — National Novel Writing Month — challenges people to write a 50,000 word book in 30 days. My collection clocks in at 58,000 words. If I were to estimate how much time I spent on this one, small book, I imagine it would be in the region of 800 hours, not counting any incidental edits, moments of sudden inspiration or read-throughs. That’s 800 hours in addition to my usual working day. There was a part of me, when I first started writing my collection, where I thought I wouldn’t mind giving it out for free. I just wanted people to read it. Now, after spending countless hours of my life writing, re-writing, editing and formatting, my time has value. Every writer and artist’s time is valuable. Just imagine if every author set a price on their work by billing readers by the hour!

Self-publishing was a rollercoaster of a journey, and not one I was completely prepared for. I’ve learned that I thoroughly enjoy writing, even more than I thought I did. I’ve also discovered I’m not too terrible at it, and I am forever improving. Despite any stresses I’ve encountered, even when a lot of the process sucked the joy out of doing it at all, I did what I set out to do — I wrote and published a book. Not for fame, nor riches. Not for public acclaim or to prove a point. But for me. So I could hold a little piece of art in my hands and say, “I made that, and I’m proud of it.”

Dark Winds Over Wellington: Chilling Tales of the Weird & the Strange – Available Now

Welcome to Wellington, the Coolest Little Capital, where nothing is quite what it seems.

Strange creatures lurk in the shadows of the Beehive, while a Beast arises From The Deep determined to destroy us all. Being Neighbourly might just change your life, and if you listen closely you can hear demonic Whispers in the wind.

So sit back, take a sip of A Good Cup of Coffee and question all The Things You See. In the city there are no Second Chances and every chapter might be your last. 

Inspired by Wellington legends and folklore, these thirteen original short stories will drag you on a chilling journey through the eerie, the weird and the strange. 

Buy it at Amazon and Smashwords 

Dark Winds Over Wellington: Chilling Tales of the Weird & the Strange © Tabatha Wood, 2019. Published by Wild Wood Books.